I always think that Im fine with what ever I am doing now. I always make myself feel happy, doing things that makes people happy. But I'm not happy. Even my family, there's nothing to be happy about.

I've let everyone in the family down. My mom dad grandma what so ever. I wanted to cry sometimes but I dunno where to start from. Where can I put all my sorrows to.? My heart is just so pain. So pain that I ache every second. It makes me shivers thru hot weathers, it makes my tears wanna drop down in happy moments.

I'm so sad. Seriously sad. I've always ask people to be happy, but I'm not. And I dunno how to face all my problems now. I really dunno. I dunno what's gonna happen next time to come.

I'm jus so lost. Who's there to guide me? Jus who? =(